I had always thought I would grow old with Shinee. Even if they were not together making music or still a complete group, at least I will draw comfort knowing that they were still on this earth - eating delicious foods, traveling, working a different career, having girlfriends, getting married, starting a family and perhaps getting together with their bandmates to reminisce about old times. Never would I have thought that I would have to mourn the death of one of the members. Someone that was still at the peak of his life. What were the pressures and the amount of pain that he had to endure for him to end it? Jonghyun - I wish someone - anyone - could have helped you see hope.
Shinee was always my go-to for instant happiness. Their music has an incredible uplifting quality. Their voices in beautiful harmony and their precise dance moves executed to perfection made me want to work hard and strive - knowing that such excellence was possible. They gave me so much joy - at the end of a hard day, I would catch up with Shinee. Listen to their music on the commute, find the latest news, spazz with fellow Shawols, watch and re-watch their concerts and variety show segments where their natural humor and chemistry was on full display.
How I loved them together as a group! Five different personalities that just worked so well together. It was the cohesion, the easy camaraderie and respect that resonated so deeply with me . When I saw them live in Shinee World V in Seoul, I thought my heart was going to burst with happiness. It was literally hurting - and at the same time, I felt guilty for feeling such incredible happiness at that moment when others in the world were suffering. It hurts all the more to know that while you were giving happiness to fans, you yourself could not find it.
I know I would never love another group as much as Shinee. I shall cherish, love and support the others as much as I can. Jonghyun - your incredible voice and music will be missed. You did so well. Rest in peace.
